Just being. Whole, Perfect, Strong, Powerful, Loving, Harmonious, and Happy. That’s me!
I struggle hardest now because I know the end of my old subconscious and the end of my old blueprint are near… and they are engaged in a hail Mary goal line stand! I get it. Fifty some odd years of building habits and responses to situations that I am now trying to reprogram… who said it would be easy? Who expected it to be easy? Who hoped it would be easier … raising my hand 😉
I struggle to maintain peace and harmony… and always try to look behind the situation for the lesson or message now. What reason is this happening?… What can I learn from this? What am I pretending not to know? Such deep questions can no longer have simple answers and I am learning to probe deeper… to listen to my heart that I have drowned out for so long that I know it will take hard work to allow it to be heard again… this time with the understanding of letting it be my guide… following what my heart wants… how long have I not done that? I feel as a released prisoner. This is my day.
As I was having my sub made a wonderful woman struck up conversation with me in the line. While paying for my sub, the other worker dropped this wonderful woman’s wrap onto the register next to mine. Loud and clear I heard the universe as I nodded to Taylor to add hers to mine. As quickly as I could I made my way to the door but…. BUSTED… “HEY!” I heard the woman cry. I turned quickly to acknowledge her gratitude and smiled… heading out the door… but I wasn’t done yet. As I pulled out of my parking spot and headed for the exit… the woman stepped off the walk and blocked my escape… Standing in the driveway she made me stop and roll down my window. She once again thanked me for her wrap and as she stepped out of the way I exited. Normally I enjoy praise for a good deed done… recognition for creative expression… but trying to do something kind and not getting caught brought a whole new perspective… a whole new awareness to me. As happy as I was to do the deed, I was confused by wanting to not get caught being more important than gratefully accepting her gratitude.
I know me not, for I am a new man with a new life…